If truth be told, I've tried yoga a few times. Ok... a lot of times. And each time, I decide I'm just not a yoga person. I have lots of reasons. Yoga isn't fast enough. My mind wanders too much. I'm bored. Well, I tried it again today and learned something about myself. I'm a yoga weinie. I SAY it's because yoga isn't fast enough. I SAY it's because my mind wanders. I SAY it's because I'm bored, but the realization I had today as I was in Child's Pose while everyone else was perfectly emulating the instructor's pose (which wasn't Child's Pose), is that I hate being inept. Ten minutes into the class I'm sweating like a dog ("Why is no one else sweating like me? I'm so out of shape."). I'm the only one that has to use the blocks because my hammies are so tight that I can't reach the floor ("I'm getting so old. I should have taken better care of myself.") I have no idea what 80% of the poses are so I get frustrated. But here's the crazy thing. I got through the class! It wasn't pretty. It wasn't elegant. And, even though I started out a yoga wienie, at the end I felt freaking AWESOME! Maybe it was the equivalent of a runner's high...is there a yoga high? But, for the rest of the day, I felt super!
I've thought about this experience all day and wondered what else my negative self-talk is preventing me from experiencing? Golf is a perfect example. My husband and I used to play together alot. And then he got good. I'm talking really good. So I quit. Yep, I'm a golf wienie. Golf had become a 4 hour opportunity to tell myself how terrible I was because I couldn't compete with my husband. I'd come off the course feeling frustrated and resentful that he had spent several years working on his golf game and had the nerve to get better! So in addition to taking away a great reason to be outside for 4 hours on a beautiful day, I also spent less time with my husband doing something fun.
So, here's the plan. I got a 2 week pass to a local yoga studio and I'm trying 4 different yoga classes (not hot yoga though..how in the world do people do that?) and work on enjoying the experience and keeping the self-talk to a minimum. I've also decided to get back out on the driving range and practice green after dinner a couple nights a week to work on my game. I think I'm even going to suggest date night each week over the summer be a round of golf. My husband may stroke out.
Are there things in your life that negative self-talk is stopping you from achieving participating in or enjoying? What would you do or try if you weren't so tough on yourself? It won't be easy. But when I think about how great I will feel when I can be at the front of the yoga class and not in the last row or how nice it will be walking out on the golf course with my hubby on a beautiful summer evening the effort it will take seems worthwhile. What's your plan?